I recently took a class with a coach that mesmerized me. It was like I just knew I needed to be educated by her. I saw my future success and my connection to this style… I wanted it. Needed it.
Then I saw the price tag. Yikes! She is totally worth what she's charging, I just couldn't do it. Timing is off. I spent the better part of the last few weeks with total, full-blown FOMO. I still have it, but I know that as much as I can't do it now, I will do it when the timing is better for our family. It sucks.
So, why am I complaining here? Get to the point… don't be such a "Karen". I know, I know.
It hit me today. I'm actually dreaming about a potential client that I'm due to follow up with in a few days. How will I help her? What will help me connect? What will be that "thing" that will help me make a positive impact.
While scrolling through social media, I scrolled past a post from a childhood friend. It was her Christmas card. Signed by her and the kids. No husband, who I also knew from childhood. It made me pause. The normal curiosity (otherwise known as being nosey!) hit me. But then as it made me think about my clients, it made me pause. Looking back all the way to high school, we had our social status cliques. The Cheerleaders, The Jocks, The Misfits, The Nerds, etc. How many of us wanted to be the cool cheerleaders in the "cool" club?
Don't go down the social media rabbit hole, but think for a minute to yourself, "Where are they now?"
How many are divorced, never married, stuck in a dead-end job? How many have multiple "baby daddies" or can't have a child they desperately want?
Before you're horrified, I'm not knocking anyone. These are judgements we make of all people. Right or wrong, they are just that … judgements. Comparison is the thief of joy. And my point of this blog is that we start having FOMO from so early on.
As adults, we need to use our wisdom. Those divorcees, maybe they stem from a drinking problem, maybe abuse. That dead-end job might be what's helping make ends meet and you're not seeing the second job they have. The baby daddies…. we just don't know the background. We just don't know.
While talking to a client today, we spoke of different "maps". Everyone has a different one, even people from the same family. Our relationships with people are different. Even sisters have a different relationship with their mothers. It's not drastic in most cases, but they are different. But again, FOMO shows up here. "I wish I had a relationship like you and mom" or "The boss likes you better."
That fear of missing out can be likability, financial, even the most basic "I'm better than you are." And we carry this through for everything.
So my personal FOMO… a peer is doing the classes with that awesome coach. She was able to do it now (which I'm so excited for her!). After I dust myself off, I realized that the skills my friend and I have are different… and that's a great thing!!! By NOT doing this extra class, I reach out to people a little differently. I will be as good of a coach no matter which path I chose. I can only be me! And today, I celebrate that! Why? Because I can have FOMO as much as the next person, but there is only one me. The time will come, the stars will align and if this is the right opportunity, I will sing it from the rooftops. My voice of wisdom had to take control!
What does your voice of wisdom tell you today?